I’ve Got My Running Shoes On

IMG_3317

I’ve got my running shoes on and my Camelback packed, and I am ready to stomp out my ridiculously out-of-control blood sugars. Enough is enough.

I don’t talk much about my Type 1 diabetes because I don’t like to admit that I have a weakness…and because I don’t participate in pity parties…and I do not like to hear “Bless your heart, my grandmother died from that.” I always ask if the grandmother had Type 1…well, let’s just take a look at a dialogue to help explain why I don’t chat about having the sugar.

Well-Meaning Person: What is that?

Me: It is an insulin pump.

Well-Meaning Person: You got diabetes?

Me: Yes, I am a Type 1.

Well-Meaning Person: Is that the bad kind?

Me: All types of diabetes are bad.

Well-Meaning Person: My grandmother died from that.

Me: From Type 1 diabetes?

Well-Meaning Person: From diabetes. Her final days on this Earth were terrible. She was suffering from kidney failure. The dialysis wasn’t working anymore. Bless her heart. She had part of her leg amputated last June. She was a fighter though. Granny never let losing her eyesight bother her. I remember when the fluid started…

Me: *interrupting this lovely story* I am sorry to interrupt, but I just remembered that I have got to be somewhere.

1208780_10201791449978241_259121923_nTalking about any disease is tricky…getting the right information across to your audience is crucial. I am part of a “category”–each “item” in that “category” is different. I am not a doctor…nor do I play one on TV…so, how do I define my disease to those who do not have it…to those who do not understand….

I am weary from clarifying that one does not “outgrow” Type 1 diabetes.

I am weary from explaining that no diet, no particular form of exercise, no special pills, no special pink drink, no special herb concoction will cure me…will cure my Type 1 diabetes.

The reality is harsh.

There is no cure.

Admitting that to myself has not been easy.

Bless.

Please do not pity me.

ATTENTION PLEASE: This post is not to seek pity.

Even though there is no cure, there is hope. There is also a chance that I will die a horrible death…blind, without kidney function, and legless…

BUT…I am NOT going down without a fight. A SERIOUS FIGHT!!!

I am ready! Got my Nike running shoes, Camelbak, Mattie, and Ziva. I am taking back control...and no one will miss seeing me do it because I sporting BRIGHT :)

Nike running shoes–CHECK–Camelbak–CHECK–Mattie and Ziva–CHECK

So, I’ve got my running shoes on and my Camelbak packed because I will live to die another day. Bond. James Bond.

Stay tuned for future posts about the survival contents in my Camelbak and the progress on the home renovation–which has now turned into “Get This House Ready to Sell” mode…oh, yes…the Hathorns are about to be on the move again.

Thanks for sitting a spell with me today!

Chasidy

Advertisements

6 thoughts on “I’ve Got My Running Shoes On

  1. Nora Gay says:

    Thanks for posting this! Hoyt was diagnosed almost a year ago and has been a trooper throughout, has never complained once, and is living the life of a seventh grader at WA. When I look around at other diseases and sickness, I realize he is fine. It’s not curable, be very manageable. The reality of this finally hit me about 6 months ago and I HATE it! I never let him see me bothered, but some days I just want to throw all the paraphernalia away! I am a person that lives in a black and white world……I don’t do grey…..if you get cancer, cut it out, treat it and you are done, or it goes the other way, but there is even closure in death. As a mother, I know this is turning my baby into the man God wants him to be, but I have to figure out what he is trying to teach me also. I want the numbers to be absolute, and continuous, but that’s never going to happen.

    I hope you feel better soon and never let it stop you from creating!
    NG

    • chasidyhathorn says:

      Nora Gay,

      I am so sorry to hear that Hoyt has “the sugar,” but so thrilled that he is being a trooper and living as much of a normal life as one can checking blood sugars and managing all the information/items necessary to keep it controlled.

      Having a great support system is the most important…and he has a wonderful family and a great small, family school environment πŸ™‚

      Funny that you said “paraphernalia” because I say that all the time! It’s actually in my next blog post about what I’ve packed inside my Camelbak! There are a lot of “items” involved in being a Type 1 diabetic….I wear an insulin pump and continuous glucose sensor so every three days I have a small pile of trash from changing out both of them!

      Type 1 diabetes is definitely a roller coaster ride! The caregivers suffer as much as the ones with the disease. I know Stan and Abby worry…I am not getting any younger haha so it is getting harder to bounce back from a low…and from an extreme high. They see my frustration with the blood sugars…they know the dangers and complications from those numbers…it is a burden on us all…and I hate that.

      It is a disease that must be fought and managed every hour of every day. To be honest, I just got tired of managing it…I just wanted to be normal…but I am not normal πŸ™‚ so I have to fight…every single day to live a better and healthier life…

      God does have a purpose…His ways or not our ways…I have no idea why I have it, but I believe that God wants me to talk about it…

      Thank you so much for your comment because it helps me know that I am doing what God wants me to…at this moment…with this disease that I have…because no matter how we “sugarcoat” diabetes…it is a disease.

      If you ever have any questions or just need someone to chat diabetic paraphernalia with…don’t hesitate to get in touch!

      Hugs xx,

      Chasidy

  2. beadsoul says:

    Chasidy- I am blessed to have gotten to know even a bit more about such a courageous person. Your optimistic outlook is 1/2 of the battle and your spunk and determination will keep you going.

    You have inspired me to take action with my health issues; thanks for that.

    I wish you health, happiness and super-doses of D-buttkicking powers!

    • chasidyhathorn says:

      Thanks so much, Lisa (Beadsoul)! That comment made my day πŸ™‚

      It is not easy to stay spunky and optimistic, but I give it my best…and pray for strength and spunk πŸ™‚ I think it is perfectly acceptable to pray for spunk πŸ˜‰

      Taking care of yourself is not easy…we get so busy with life and taking care of others that we push ourselves aside…getting over the guilt of taking time for myself has been the biggest battle!

      I wish you health, happiness, and super-doses of buttkicking powers because you are a sweet and beautiful person πŸ™‚

      Hugs xx

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s